My own misery and lack of general direction in life has inspired me to focus on my writing for a number of reasons, some of which I will list now:
1. I like writing
2. I’m good at writing…almost as good as I am at inhaling fun size candy bars
3. I have relevant and hilarious things to say
4. People ask me about my blog all the time and then I have to admit to the both of us that I am a huge failure and don’t post because I’m too busy...which translates into paralyzation by Supernanny re-runs
5. With age, I am losing my funniness and I’m in a desperate search to hold onto the little that remains
6. Writing exercises my brain and unfortunately my brain has been in a quasi-hibernation since college (and it has nothing to do with my alcohol intake during those years…please see my liver for any issues pertaining to Beast consumption)
7. Writing is a release- it’s therapy. I can, share, vent, identify, explore, analyze, and gather comrades to laugh with.
8. A small part of me believes my blog will just happened to be discovered Brian Fate style. You know, the record producer who just happened to be jogging by the garage and discovered Zach Attack.
9. I want to be a Kathy Griffin/Chelsea Handler/Conan O’Brien/Shaquille O’Neal/Tucker Max hybrid of hilarious glory.
10. It is my duty. I feel it is my duty to serve you- the people, my readers, my friends- a daily dose of hilariousness. And by daily, I mean I’m aiming to post at least three times a week until I become the hybrid listed in #9 and will have the time to post everyday since it will be my full-time job and I can spend the rest of my days in 6 hour work-out regimens with my trainer to the stars.
Will my boring, miserable life get in the way of making all of this happen? It’s possible. But I will be keeping my eye on the prize…Brian Fate.
